I once thought I'd be
happy when you died.
But now - I think of you
and feel nothing.
Where once was rage is no empty.
I feel the lack.
Now I see -
I liked having you alive to hate.
Sad isn't it?
I remember saying
I'd build a dance floor on your grave.
But cremation leaves no grave behind.
Could that be the cause?
Perhaps that is why...
I know longer feel anything at the thought of you.
Nothing changes
but nothing is ever the same again.
I just go on.
Scarred.
I go on.
31 July 2004